Dear lesbian women,
As a bisexual woman, I am of course looking for other cool women in the dating game.When I wiped a hard-working back and forth, I noticed something: I have the profile of a lesbian woman in front of me, I hesitate briefly, even if I find her totally attractive.Because honestly: I'm a little afraid that you don't like us.
-
When are you actually bisexual?
Fabian and Jennifer are bisexual-and talk about clichés, bifeginality and how they have experienced their coming out.
I'll take a quick time: bisexuals don't always get away well in the scene.Some prejudices: bisexuals are only shy away from a homosexual coming out.They want to keep their hetero-privileges.And you like to have homosexual affairs, but when it gets serious((get married, get children), then lie down on a hetero partner.These prejudices are nonsense.Nevertheless, I could imagine that they are worried to you.Because of course we have it easier on some levels than you: We bisexuals can at least hide from discrimination against data in the heterosexual world.Our coming-out often also went differently.This gives way a few joint experiences.
Many women are not bisexual, but keen to experiment
What we cannot offer either: celebrating the purely female lesbian world.When I look at lesbian tikoks, Instagram accounts or YouTube videos, I'm sometimes really intimidated.You celebrate your queer outfits, your female power world, to which Straighte cis men have no access, and your gayness in general.And then it is also rumored by the lesbian preference, just wanting to have something with women who are as unaffected by men as possible.Can we keep up?After all, we are those who often continue to go through heterosexual.We continue to rave about men, even if we love women.And are usually not as much immersed in the scene as you.
To make matters worse, there are many women who could imagine sleeping out of curiosity and joy of experimentation with a woman.Not all of these adventurous people categorically exclude a relationship with a woman.Nevertheless, such encounters can of course lead to disappointments if you are looking for something serious and then realize that you were only the adventure.It does not make it easier to find out that the term is currently bisexual and may also be used inflationarily how "serious" a woman really means by the same gender.Are we bisexuals for you in the adventure drawer?
Sometimes all of these circumstances lead to you don't want to get involved with a bisexual woman?Are you afraid that we could leave you for a man?Do you secretly prefer lesbian women?Or do we worry too much?
Best regards
Your bisexual women
The answer:
Dear bisexual women,
I heard myself and can calm you down: we like you.So like swiped to the right and send a message with funny gif.We also answer when we find you cool to you.Just, I don't want to lie to you, it can happen that some of us send a delicate skepticism with the funny answer gifs.Or a pretty solid.
Why?Why skeptical when we supposedly like you?We ask ourselves that too.We lesbians who don't care, whether a person is lesbian or bisexual or rumenexual or something completely different, we lesbians who just want to meet great women.However, we will leave our colorful, endlessly open((cough) world behind us, we will empathize with the lesbian skeptics.
Let's stay figurative with this gif, which we skepticists have put on our skepticism.When we send the GIF - what fears, what prejudices are in us at this moment?You have already made a few accurate suggestions, as we find, dear bi-women.Let's See.
You have already recognized that we celebrate our purely female world
We turn your order upside down and start with the fake to how you have lovingly named them.The fake-Bi anxiety affects us especially when it comes to getting to know each other earlier.It is in various younger bubbles hip to be bisexual as a woman.Bi means openly, BI is called anti -philistency, anti -heteronorm.Some of these self-proclaimed bi-women cannot or do not want to get involved in women, so according to the common label are not really bi((at least at this moment; sexuality is not rigid, but fluide).A lesbian that is looking for a woman with whom she can share underwear in the long term may be disappointed by such a fake-Bi woman.That will then be stabbed, generalized, and in the end you are collectively suspicious and we: skeptical.
Next is our plush lesbian world that you have spoken.We always had our rooms, in the past few years the younger ones have also built a huge, pretty tikk-castle, far away from the patriarchal heteroversum.Some live in this plush world so hard that they later look around in the real world and are completely confused that there are men;And women who are hetero.You have already recognized that we celebrate our purely female world.It's not just fun, we also feel safe.When heterosexual or bisexual girlfriends tell of negative experiences with men, we can only shock, angry, and certainly a little self -righte, shake our head.Something like that hardly happens to us.We know that men are not cruel, but their socialization is often.With us it is cozy and queer and love.
I think some of us do not understand how you can move in this heteronormative, male -centered consensus.Maybe even finds it comfortable.Feminist Sara Ahmed compares in her book "Living Feminist!- Manifesto for spoilers ”the heteronormative world with an armchair:" Think about how it is to feel good: For example, you sink into a very comfortable armchair.Convenience is about the fit between body and the object: my comfortable armchair is possibly uncomfortable for you and your differently shaped body.((...) Heteronormativity works as a kind of public convenience by allowing bodies to extend into areas that have already adopted their shape.((...) Wenn du Heterosexualität nicht bewohnst, fühlst du dich wahrscheinlich angesichts der Behaglichkeit der Heterosexualität unwohl((…)."
Of course, it is presumptuous to say that, just because you are also with men, you will find heteronormativity in a great way.You are already abnormal with your bisexuality.But I believe that it is possible that you could feel comfortable, let us believe that you can never fully understand how uncomfortable it is for us.In addition, what you also addressed: We had to fight ourselves into this plush, many of us at least.And even if we have our safe space in it, hostility is still waiting for us on the outside. Ihr genießt Heteroprivilegien((habt ihr ja als Vorurteil erwähnt, ist es aber nicht immer), und kommt dann zu „uns" hereinspaziert.This can quickly trigger skepticism towards you, in the worst case an hostility.
You still have to endure some skepticism.
Yes, yes, we know ourselves, these points of view are unfair and stuck, many of us do not find them particularly great, but we believe that they exist and therefore should be said, and that such points of view are quite normal.Doesn't mean that we have not already got any further elsewhere, you have spoken of prejudices, and I think yes, many are outdated, have decreased, or have even become an embarrassing round table phrase. „Bisexuelle können sich nicht entscheiden" – sowas ist wirklich in großen Teilen der Community unsagbar geworden, viele andere höre ich ebenfalls weniger bis gar nicht mehr.
Dear bisexual women, manche Skepsis müsst ihr wohl noch ertragen, Fronten abbauen dauert leider.All other lesbians are already looking forward to your gifs without hesitation.It is precisely you are the personified dissolution of fronts, the connection between multiple worlds, the proof that there is not only one or the other, that there are mixes and ambiguities and must give that love has something to do with people,And not necessarily with gender attributions.Bi women, we like you!And now we want to finally write down your HER-Messages, Bumble Messages, Tinder-Messages, Instagram messages in an emergency, regardless of the pandemy, so go lonely, so go.Come on!
Your lesbian women
More queer questions and answers:
And other texts too
Bisexuelle Menschen, seid ihr nicht eigentlich pansexuell?
Pansexual people fall in love with others regardless of their gender.Doesn't that also apply to bisexuals?
Haben Lesben die besseren Beziehungen?
A conversation about relationship clichés and what it is like to be able to deal with roles more freely.
Trans Menschen, wie findet ihr euren neuen Namen?
From your parents you got a name that does not match your real gender.How do you decide how you really want?
Bisexuelle Menschen, seid ihr nicht eigentlich pansexuell?
Pansexual people fall in love with others regardless of their gender.Doesn't that also apply to bisexuals?
Haben Lesben die besseren Beziehungen?
A conversation about relationship clichés and what it is like to be able to deal with roles more freely.
Trans Menschen, wie findet ihr euren neuen Namen?
From your parents you got a name that does not match your real gender.How do you decide how you really want?
Zur StartseiteShare this post with others
Kommentare einblenden Zur StartseiteFollow us on the following channels:
